We want to buy a house. Not a mansion, just an average sized house with a garden. Dad2babyinsomniac wants a garage and a woodburner, and we want it to be in a nice quiet area, possibly in a village. That’s all.
It’s not that much to ask. A few decades ago it was standard procedure for families to buy a house, back then it was even possible to buy a house and live comfortably on just the mans wages. My parents bought their first house in 1984 when I was a baby, my dad was earning £25,000 and they paid £36,000 for it. Today the same houses are on the market for £750,000. The shocking thing is that although the house prices have gone up so drastically, the wages don’t seem to have changed at all – resulting in first-time buyers like myself being priced out of the market. At the peak of my Dads career he was earning nearly £100,000 which back in those days led to us having a fairly priviliged lifestyle although stupidly they didn’t invest any of this money - infact most of it went on living in holiday cottages, moving house and ten years of private school fees (which had I been to one school might have resulted in the outcome that they were expecting, but due to the disturbance of changing schools once a year and the fact that I stopped attending in year 11, I only ended up taking 5 GCSE’s). They would have been better off saving up the money they had spent on school fees for when I was grown up needed a deposit for a house! I am not complaining though, we did get to go on pretty amazing holidays twice a year – luckily, as this was the only time me and my sister used to get on!
We are currently renting in a not so great part of a Somerset town and although it’s cheap, it comes with drawbacks. We have a nutter who lives three doors down, he is known locally as a ‘nasty piece of work’ and has been in and out of prison for various reasons. On three occasions we have had every police car in Somerset turn up outside our house – two of which were in the middle of the night and resulted in me not getting any sleep. Within a month of moving in, I woke up to him smashing every window of his house before setting fire to all his girlfriends stuff in the garden. On Friday morning I got woken up at 3am by the sound of him smashing his house up and attacking his girlfriend. This was the view from my house a couple of months ago – there had been some kind of assault.
Bit excessive – it is Somerset though, they must have been bored.
Living here was only ever going to be a short-term solution to enable us to sort our finances out so that we could buy somewhere. Dad2babyinsomniac is an electrician and has just started his own business and I am about to start a college course to enable me to teach baby massage, so it’s going to be one year before I am working and two years before his accounts are (hopefully) good enough to be considered for a mortgage.
I just don’t really want to stay here for that long. If I thought that we would definitely be able to buy somewhere after that time then I could handle it but based on the house prices today, you can’t really get anywhere worth buying for less then £200,000 and even if we managed to get a mortgage for that much which is highly unlikely, we would still have the problem of finding a 10% deposit which is completely impossible. We are both in debt, have no savings and no family that would be able to help us.
If it’s not going to be possible to buy after that time then we may as well just move somewhere nicer to rent and hope that one day the situation changes. Renting just isn’t ideal long-term though as you are paying a ridiculous amount of money for nothing, you will never have anything to show for it, you can’t decorate or make it your own and there is no point in getting too used to living there as you might have to move. Plus the fact that I had a quick look on Rightmove yesterday and all the houses in our price range are horrible, even the ones above our price range aren’t great.
And if the house situation wasn’t bad enough, the cost of living is even worse. I live opposite Sainsburys and have been in there every day for the last year and in that time I have watched the price of food rise almost monthly – not by a couple of pennies but by 50p or more. Newborn nappies have gone up by over a pound in less than a year. Fresh fruit is a rare luxury and passing my driving test a few months ago was pointless as I can’t afford to pay nearly a grand a year for my insurance, and if I could then I wouldn’t be able to afford to pay for petrol. We don’t smoke, don’t drink, don’t really go out and yet we still never have enough money to be able to save for our future.
I know I am moaning and should just be grateful for what I do have but I just want to live in a house that Iyla can grow up in and will one day be ours, in an area that doesn’t have people causing disturbances that lead to the entire police force and half the fire brigade being called out on a regular basis. Is that really so much to ask?
In the meantime we are stuck living here. We know we need to move before Iyla becomes aware of what is going on – I don’t want her waking up to that kind of thing in the middle of the night. I just hope that once we are both working things might start to improve a bit, and I also hope that the neighbour from hell goes back to prison for a while.
I can really sympathise with you. I think once you have a baby, you really want to be able to set down roots, to decorate and get settled. We just about managed to buy where we are now through a first time buyer scheme. Its a two bed flat, which much as I love, once LittleMan is toddling, will soon be too small. We were desperate to get on the ladder but this place will be far from ideal in another year, and we won’t be in a position to move then.
It’s really tough, and you want to be somewhere perfect once you have kids. We lived in some horrible places before but now we like living somewhere quiet. By the time we move we’ll also have to be thinking about schools; as well as finding the right house.
It definitely seems that houses and wages haven’t gone up at the same rate.
It’s so unfair isn’t it? Our parents generation had it so much easier. The last time Dad2babyinsomniac tried to get a mortgage they said they would lend him £90,000, I mean seriously you can’t even buy a garage for that these days. I was just speaking to someone the other day about the school situation, houses cost even more don’t they if you want to live in the catchment area of a good school. It is definitely having a baby that has made me want to settle down though as I would love to move into somewhere that we can be until she is grown up
It is so rubbish x
Mum2babyinsomniac recently posted..Is Buying A House Really Too Much To Ask?
You’re not moaning, you are thinking about yours and your baby’s future. No-one should have to live near a nutjob who is causing havoc every other night. That’s a lot of police cars for assault. Crikey, he must be bad. As my mum frequently says, times have changed. Money went a long way back then… Alas, no more.
Mcai7td3 recently posted..Silent Sunday – 05/09/11
Yeah he is pretty nasty when he wants to be, although he is always nice to me which is worse as I have to smile sweetly and pretend everything is fine as I don’t want to get on the wrong side of him. Yep times have changed, money doesn’t seem to go anywhere these days. The only place mine goes is to Sainsburys! x
Mum2babyinsomniac recently posted..Episiotomy Done – Now For A Painkiller Up The Bumhole?!
Great post – I can sympathise with you on the whole house front. We managed to save up a deposit and even bought a small flat, all the the height of the market. Then the children arrived and we had to move – lost all the deposit in the slump and can’t afford a new house now. Living with in laws
now.
BlendingTime recently posted..Attack of the Pegs
Oh god, poor you. It is just so hard, I think they even say that there is no point in buying anymore and to just rent but I mean where does that leave everyone. It is good for people who already own properties but rubbish for everyone else. I guess at least you can try and save up whilst living with your in-laws and hopefully things will start to change soon. I mean they can’t just keep going up, can they?!
Mum2babyinsomniac recently posted..Is Buying A House Really Too Much To Ask?
Completely agree that it is almost impossible for young adults/families to get on the property ladder. We have only managed it because our deposit was provided by very generous inlaws. Even then, we could only afford the cheapest of the cheap, in a bad area. No room for more babies, can’t afford a bigger mortgage (nor would we be lent one whilst I’m not working) so we will be here for a long while yet. The area is rough and schools have bad reps. We can’t afford essential repairs to the house. Sometimes I forget why we decided to buy instead of rent.
Chloe recently posted..Rocking Horse
Ahh I know, it is so tough. Our parents generation had it so much easier. I was speaking to someone about the school situation the other day, it’s another thing that you have to consider once you have kids, not to mention wondering what the local kids are up to and if you would want your kids to be hanging aournd with them (which in my case, I don’t). Fingers crossed things start to look better soon
x
Mum2babyinsomniac recently posted..Is Buying A House Really Too Much To Ask?
Thanks for the great post – I know how you feel but didn’t realise so many others were in the same boat.
Despite having a good job with a decent salary, nursery fees and the general cost of living these days means I’ve been forced to rent in an area where I’m surrounded by nutters who have no desire to do anything but stay exactly where they are in life and cause as much disruption as possible doing it. Thankfully, I got a new job recently, which will mean that I can just about afford to move into an area…renting of course…at twice the price so my LO can go to a decent school.
Hang it there, you’ll get through it, but the government need to address this issue. It’s affecting a whole generation and there will no doubt be a knock on effect for our children.
TIP: Check with your local authority, but if you do decide to move and rent elsewhere, you may need to do so nearly a year before your LO goes to school. Where I live, applications for next years school places must be returned by January at the latest.
Yep that sounds like where I live! Nursery fees are just ridiculous, in the job I was doing previously, I only earnt £45 a day and the cost of the nursery that I would want Iyla to go to is £42 a day, so I would be working for £3. Congratulations on your new job, that’s good news that you can move and your LO can go to a good school but so unfair that it going to cost you so much rent just for that to happen. It has to change, otherwise our kids don’t stand a chance of anything, university fees have risen so much that it’s not going to be possible for a lot of people to go and if the cost of driving lessons, petrol and food keeps rising – I dread to think what the world will be like. Somethings got to give, fingers crossed it happens soon x
Mum2babyinsomniac recently posted..Is Buying A House Really Too Much To Ask?
It is unfair how we are all out priced of the market now.
We have been renting for years. We were actually in a position to buy a small house a couple of years ago, but decided to put the deposit into my OH’s small business instead. So glad we made that decision as the house prices dropped and we would have ended up, chained to mortgage repayments in a house with negative equity. Plus the business is now providing for our family
.
Although it hurts to know we are paying of someone else’s mortgage, we look at the positives of renting.
Here are some reasons it works for us:
- Rents cheaper per week than mortgage repayments
- No hidden costs, e.g rates and maintenance etc
- If our income reduces we can move somewhere cheaper (like we just did)
- I can remain a stay at home(I would have had to be back at work straight away if we had mortgage)
- If something breaks I just call the landlord/agency
- All of above = less stress!
- Can move when we want (We get itchy feet)
- Can afford to live in a nicer place than if we bought
- House prices will continue to crash (I think) and our buying time will come eventually..
You may be better off perhaps finding a more suitable place to rent for a while, until houses are more affordable and banks are more generous – as it will come around again. It has to.
I have had friends so desperate to get on to the property ladder, to only end up financially crippled and losing everything. That’s not living the dream..Bide your time there is no rush.
P.S I grew up on that same estate, and I turned out alright..:-P (well kinda haha!)
Yep that is very true, in fact a few people have replied to my post who have ended up losing their deposits and making a loss from buying at the wrong time, so I guess renting does seem like a better option at the moment. I can’t imagine how awful it must be to put everything into a house and then lose it all.
I think we are going to give it a year, hope our finances are looking a bit better and then try and find somewhere to rent on a long-term basis until the housing market (hopefully) improves.
If that is the house that you have down-graded to then the one before must have been gigantic! I saw the photos on Facebook, it is so spacious and roomy! Jealous!
This estate isn’t too bad, I think I am just unlucky to have ended up with the nutter next door, one thing that does really get to me though is all the teenage boys that drive around in those cars where when they accelerate it sounds like a rocket taking off! And they all like to sit in Sainsburys car park and beep their horns together! Seriously annoying! xx
Mum2babyinsomniac recently posted..Is Buying A House Really Too Much To Ask?
We’re lucky the houses over here are all pretty good in size as there is a lot less people and A LOT of space! Downside to our new place is that we are right next to an airport! Hence the lower rent.. Its only a domestic one though so its not too noisy.
Real shame about your neighbours, must really make a difference to how comfortable you feel at home. Hopefully they go before you have to.
I noticed those boy racers in sainsbury’s carpark when I was back, had to push my pram right through thier little ‘gathering’ as they were all parked right infront of the foot path, loosers surely there is somewhere nicer to hang out?? Sainsbury’s wasnt even there when I grew up, was all fields with cows and trees for me to climb!
Firstly I can totally understand your feelings, we were in a similar position 2 years ago. We were planning to start a family and wanted to do it in our own place. So we took the decision to move home for 6 months and save like mad. Not fun living with the parents again but often the only way as saving when paying rent is hard. We also moved out of Bristol into Wiltshire to be able to afford a house.
But I do think that as a country we are a bit obsessed with house buying. A lot of other countries don’t have the same culture. Sure it’s nice having your own place, but there also significant costs and risks with it. By renting you don’t have any of the maintenance costs or the risk that the house prices fall and you are left in negative equity.
Finally I’m sure that our parents did have it so much easier actually buying a place. I know for sure that both my parents and my wifes also lived at home to scrape together the deposit. They certainly didn’t have the same amount of stuff (TV’s, sofa’s, computers etc) that we do today.
Mutterings of a fool recently posted..I’m leaving, on a jet plane
Yep, that is very true. I have heard from people who have bought somewhere and lost everything or are stuck living in a horrible area in a house that is too small for them but are unable to move. Thanks for your comment, I have had a comversation with Dad2babyinsomniac this morning and I think we are going to give it a year then find somewhere to rent in the hope that one day it will be possible to buy without risking everything. I guess the main disadvantage of renting is the fact that after fifty years you wouldn’t have anything to show for it, whereas if you are paying off a mortgage then eventually the house will be yours. I just hope one day things get better!
Mum2babyinsomniac recently posted..Is Buying A House Really Too Much To Ask?
I sympathise. We were lucky enough to get a 100% mortgage 5 years ago, however out small two bed town house is becoming increasingly too small for us. We bought when houses prices were at there highest so we are negative equity, with no way of moving. We’re stuck with seemingly no options. I’d like 3 bedrooms and a nice garden for my boys. In a nice area, its not to much to ask but its dam impossible these days.:(
Hope you work things out Xx
Thank you. Yep I have heard from a few people now who have either had to sell and lost their deposits or are stuck living in houses that are too small. It’s just rubbish! I think we are going to look at renting now until the housing market hopefully gets better! Surely it has to at some point?! x
Mum2babyinsomniac recently posted..Is Buying A House Really Too Much To Ask?
I can totally sympathise with your post hun- we were lucky to buy a house two years ago because my Mum helped us out with a deposit- I adore it and am so thankful but because we bought when rates were high our mortgage is extortionate a month and that combined with our other outgoings mean we can hardly afford to put food on the table some months. We don’t do badly compared to a lot of people and in a couple of years we will be in a better situation as we won’t be tied in to our mortgage deal but it is hard. We are limited to a 40 pound food budget a week, which is impossible when Mads is getting bigger and demanding more.
I just feel thankful to have a house and just hope and pray that we can get ourselves out of our financial situation enough that we will be able to keep it. x
Katie aka @mummydaddyme recently posted..Oh I Do Like To Be Beside The Seaside
I was going to post a reply when you first posted this blog, then I got distracted. I have come back to it now and read some of the comments too. I have to disagree that we had it easier (I am of your parents generation – got married in 82). Wages, I earned about 5kpa and my husband not much more. Yes our house cost 25k, but we put down a big deposit that we had saved up AND we paid for our own wedding. We had second/third hand furniture – the only new thing we had was the bed!
We had a mortgage that was calculated on his salary only the mortgage company wouldnt take my wages into consideration at all as the feeling then was that women would stop work when they had a family. We were lucky to get it. Mortgages were not 100%. Society and women’s expectations have changed a lot. Women would find it very difficult to get a mortgage in their own name back then.
We were not able to have a family straight away we couldn’t afford it, we waited for around 5 years. We didn’t go on holidays we couldn’t afford it. We didn’t have credit or debt because we couldn’t afford it.
Our home was not in a posh area.
Society has changed. When we got married you didnt live together, you didn’t have posh weddings (ours was self catered in the church hall and the rugby club did the bar for us)and foreign holidays were very unusual.
It must be frustrating. Our two sons are starting to face the dilemma of moving out. We are telling them they need to save a deposit, we are not in a position to help them with one at the moment (even though we would love to). It may be that they need to move to another area to live and work in (we live in a tourist area and prices are ridiculous).
If I can give a little bit of old woman advice. Cut your cloth accordingly. Try to clear your debts as soon as possible. then the money that you have used to clear that, use that to save. You won’t miss it. Instead of doing baby massage (nice, but is there really a market for it in this economic time?) why not do a book keeping course? You could work from home doing the books for people, and eventually for your partner’s business – saving paying someone else to do it.
Look for somewhere else to rent, negotiate the rent, there may be room for movement, especially if the house has been empty for a while. It is soul destroying being poor, but we cannot have everything we want in this world, we have to wait until we can afford it, and never have anything small on credit (furniture,etc.) it costs too much. If anything costs, look at how you can get the same for cheaper or free – toddler group for example.
Reading this back, it sounds like a lecture, I am sorry, its not meant to be one. But I hope that your situation is sorted out soon, and you are able to move into your own home soon.
Oh no it doesn’t sound like a lecture at all, it’s really helpful to hear what you have to say. I guess that young people today do just expect everything to happen easily and without much hard work. Me and my partner are not very careful with money at all, mainly with food. I should plan a weekly menu and cost it out as cheaply as possible but we live opposite Sainsburys and I end up going in there every day and buying each meal separately which costs a fortune. It’s where pretty much all our spare money goes. I am good with furnishing cheaply though, everything in our house was either given to us or bought second-hand from ebay. I don’t spend money on clothes either, I but a lot of stuff in charity shops as I like the fact the stuff is cheap and original. That’s interesting you say that about book-keeping, it was a toss up between the two courses when I was deciding what to do, the body massage course was free so I think I will do a book-keeping one too and then I can do them both as part-time jobs and do them for my OH as well. I think you are write about finding somewhere to rent and then just being really careful and saving for a while in the hope that one day we can buy somewhere. Thank you for your comment x
At least you recognise where you can improve matters. When we first got married we would sit down each week and balance our bank account and work out what money we had for the week. We took it out in cash and then that was it. Once it was gone it was gone. Harder with a baby, but still possible. Plan your menu for the week and go shopping for it (leave LO with OH so you are not distracted) and go once you have eaten so you are not tempted. Then we wrote down what we had spent and at the end of the month looked to see if we could justify it. We managed. It was hard. But we wanted to keep our home. If you want to buy a home, then that is what will keep you on track. Open a savings account (piss poor interest, but it is saving!) and put any left at the end of the week into it. Just that act will make you feel like you are working towards a goal. We women can be thrifty, sneaky and incredibly brave when it comes to getting what we want, we have to want it enough. You will get there. Use my email and email me if you want. Happy to give practical advice if you want it… You can do this – oh and don’t be tempted to go overboard at Christmas either! At this age, all they need is a cardboard box and wrapping paper to play with!! Set a limit for present buying for others tell them why (you are saving for a deposit for your own home), no need to go overboard on food over Christmas either, bake a cake and have that to offer visitors. We don’t need all the rubbish that goes with it. Back to basics! x